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In keeping with the 2004 campaign theme of "God's Will Be Done," this year's official White House Christmas card
features a stirringly contemporary depiction of the Holy Mother lovingly coddling the Savior
child. Sent via FedEx overnight to only the most generous patriots from the defense, e-voting, corrections, and drive-thru salvation industries,
this year's card is printed with gold-leaf inks on all-American paper made exclusively from old-growth
hardwoods freshly clearcut in the wake of new federal forest preservation guidelines.
In the grand Christmas tradition of briefly pretending to dispense with classism, the Bush family reluctantly permits all
lesser Americans to gaze upon inferior digital reproductions of this priceless, limited edition historical artifact:
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